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  • Magan Bellflower

Protecting our Special Needs Children

Updated: Dec 30, 2022

What is the underlying message of David and Goliath?

David knew size does not matter; it is COURAGE and FAITH.

How does this apply to us? As special needs parents, we are forced to do things that, under any other circumstances, we would never imagine having to do. We have battles that no one else understands. They never will.

Currently, we are fighting a battle we never thought we would have to. A struggle in which we are David, and they are Goliath, but that will not stop us from doing what needs to be done. We are a God-fearing family and know that He only allows us to have what we can handle, so even though this is a stressful time, we will get through it. As the grandchild of a pastor, it is even harder to deal with.

So many people have looked at us and said the problems are much bigger and we will never prevail. They have not met me. Part of the reason I am “stubborn” is because of my family. I fought to have my family. Even when I was told I would never have one. We have a fight instilled in us from my Great Grandmother and Grandmother. They did what it took to protect their kids, great-grandkids, and great-great-grandkids.

When my son was diagnosed with Autism, I thought it was the end of the world as I knew it, and it was. It showed me the difference in people. It showed me that the people you have come to expect to be inclusive and kind are more than not the ones that push you away and abuse you. So-called friends will push you away, but you make new ones who understand your struggles.

For three years, my son has been abused by a person from church. A man who claims he is doing God’s work. Though he never laid a physical hand on him, he has caused severe mental pain and anguish to our son. This is where our Goliath comes in. The local authorities (police and government) told us the church was too big for us to fight and deal with it. Nothing will change because of us. One child does not matter when there are many. This man even stated we couldn’t do anything because no one would stop him. We were told by members of the church body that if we had a problem with this, we would go to hell and that we must be worshipers of the devil.

So here we are, little David. Families around us have given up and left the church, but not us. As parents, we must do what is necessary to protect our children no matter what. When you are a special needs parent, that is a crucial role. Parents with autistic children have an even harder time because their child does not have a “look.” It is not as apparent that they are unique. So, when they have a meltdown in a store, you get the typical stares and dirty looks. Also, the occasional unwanted advice is that they are just spoiled, or you should spank them.

Like David, we trust God will help us in this fight and that this is the stone that will take down Goliath. To teach others that just because someone is in a position of respect, they are not always a good person. There are many wolves in sheep’s skins in the church.

Members of this church have all said there is no way this could be true and that a Christian man would not do this. The problem lies with these churches that get so big they have no idea what they are doing. When ten different people claim to be in control, when none of them know what is going on. When they are more focused on how much they can brag about the money they have and how big and elaborate they can do festivals.

This is what the LORD says in Jeremiah 9:23: Don’t let the wise boast in their wisdom, or the powerful boast in their power, or the rich boast in their riches.

This has always been about power and deception—the wicked boast.

Hopefully, in the next few months, God will prevail, bringing the situation to light. Religious Trauma is real. Abuse by the church is actually real.

Jesus replied, “Truly I tell you, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what was done to the fig tree, but also you can say to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and it will be done. ~ Matthew 21:21

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